(Notes From FB Live Sept 1 2018~ Click to Watch)

I remember how much my life changed when I first heard about the 5 Love Languages by Dr Gary Chapman. How I was able to take an informed look at my present and a investigative look at my past. I suddenly realized how I had created some unnecessary suffering in my relationships and friendships simply because I felt unloved due to them not speaking my love language!

Dr Chapman suggests there are 5 love languages in which we give and receive love. Words of Affirmation (which is mine) is verbal compliments and communication. I feel loved when people use their words! Another is Quality Time where it is all about just being together, undivided attention. Gifts is another and can be purchased, found or made or gift of your presence. And then Acts of Service is one where you are doing for another. And of course Physical Touch which is meaningful touch like holding hands or cuddling.

Once I realized what was happening, it opened me up and relaxed me in my relationships. I began to see how others were actually showing me true love but in a different way. I didn’t see Quality Time as showing me love! I thought that was a given. It was confusing for me when words were not forthcoming. Or if I bought something really special for someone and they didn’t seem to care too much, I took it personally when now I see that Gifts are not their primary language. I was able to look within myself and see how well I was reading other people and how I could change to speak their language. I was also able to ask for what it is I needed.

I remember hearing the story about the wife coming to her husband and asking “Why don’t you ever tell me you love me?” And his response “I told you 50 years ago when I married you that I love you. If I change my mind I’ll let you know!” They are both right! Just speaking different languages! And with this wee bit of information, they can shift a wee bit and meet each others needs. I just love this so much and am so happy to have remembered the learning!

#5lovelanguages #communication #claimingwellness #loveeachother #selfgrowth #ptsd #love #wordsofwisdom