(Notes from FB Live Aug 31 2018 ~ Click to Watch)

A while ago when I was struggling emotionally and trying to make changes in my life, a wise woman suggested to me that I take a close look at the people I had in my life. That sometimes we need to do a deep cleaning of our relationships like we do with our homes, with our bodies such as the annual medical checkup, our vehicles.

I sat with my cellphone in a quiet space and pulled up each contact one at a time. It quickly became important to me to think about how I felt with after I spent time with them not just overall or before. It was the after that really showcased how our friendship was and whether or not my needs or my ability to meet their needs was working.

I believe that we humans walk a similar path for a time and then branch off and walk different paths with others. We may or may not come back and walk a path together again. It is the nature of life. I believe that we are in a constant state of change – emotions, experiences, passions, skills and abilities, perspectives. I know for myself it is unhealthy to try and maintain a relationship that was formed in a time and then resists adapting as life moves forward. I have tried and failed miserably to the point that the friendship was ruined.

As I sat with my cell phone I was surprised at how many contacts I had. I don’t make friends easily. I have many acquaintances but true friends are sacred in my world. I began to see categories forming. Friends that I had been neglecting. Friends that were toxic. Friends that were simply there because having the numbers was somehow comforting. I began to see what kind of friend I was and what changes I could start making with my friendships.

That day I deleted some contacts. I reached out to my neglected friends and made little dates for us to sit and talk about our friendship and what that looked like. I sent love bombs to the few who were present and active in my life. Today I am becoming a better friend and getting my needs met by my friends. I love growth!

#friendshipschange #nurture #adapt #selfgrowth #claimingwellness #contactlist #ptsd #evaluateyourself

(Note: I took this photo up in the Yukon when we were off roading and got stuck at the river. I was struck by how lovely the old trunk was a perfect place for new life to begin and thrive.)