(Notes from FB live Aug 16 2018 ~ Click to Watch)

Today is Day 1 of my 40 day challenge for my self esteem! 40 Facebook lives! What?? 5 minutes at 7:30am. “Coffee with A Musing Lauren Rose!” punny!

Why 40 days? 40 is a spiritual number in many traditions and cultures, takes 20 days to break a habit and 20 days to form a new one, 40 spaces on a Monopoly board proving life is a gamble – equal odds of going directly to jail or winning the Free Parking Lottery!! I fundamentally believe there are many paths to wellness – pick one that resonates within ourselves and claim it! This year at the Wellness Show in Vancouver, so many products and technologies all claiming to make us feel better, look better, function better. And they are probably all right on some level. How lucky are we to live in a world of so much choice!

I have chosen challenges as a mechanism for change in my life. It gives me structure and support. I have a much greater chance of success in creating sustained change because it’s “not forever” it’s for “right now” and then … a new habit is formed! I did a 30 day challenge and stripped down my food to only whole foods with ingredients I can pronounce. Today almost a month later – I still don’t eat sauces or processed food. I crave live food! And this morning I weighed in at 199.9 lbs! I haven’t been under 200 lbs in 21 years! Little daily disciplines.. Love!

I have chosen a challenge for self esteem because I am still so limited in life because of “not good enough.” I have lived a life of “when you are happy I am safe” and “not yet dangerous” and didn’t develop a sense of self. I broke with delayed onset PTSD in 2006 that took me out of life. I am on a quest today to actualize the quote I got from Dr Seuss years ago. It took me a full year of looking at it on my screen saver daily to begin to “get it”. “Be who you are” (not who I think you think I should be) Say what you feel (not what I think you want to hear). Those who mind don’t matter (helped me separate who is important) and those who matter don’t mind (still makes me cry sometimes when I look around and see the people still in my life who have seen the real me). 💕🌹 Peace!